Monday, February 05, 2007

I Forgot About Groundhog Day!

But here it is! punxsutawney groundhog club
They said that on Feb 2, 2007, he didn't see his shadow and that means an early Spring. Sounds pretty stupid to me, but it sounds good on this stinging cold day. Don't forget to see the movie with the same name.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Jesus and Orgasms


Now I have your attention! Just as Christianity was a continuation of the elevation of women in our society (from Judaism), it also was a continuation of the idea of men giving pleasure to their women as much as getting pleasure during sex (from Judaism).

It is in Islamic based cultures where women are forced to have their body part that gives an orgasm removed so they may have no orgasms, and it is in Christ-based cultures where women are encouraged to have an orgasm. As I understand it, orgasms even help the conception process. I thank God for the men of the West who want their women to enjoy sex along with them, and pray for the men of the East who shun this.

I have always had a strong sex drive. Unfortunately, I've only experienced sex outside of God's plan. I've been frustrated and gone ahead and had sex outside of marriage, as I had no one to get married to. Therefore, I cannot preach about divine sexuality as one who has joined together in holy matrimony and been joined together with another person sexually, while also joined to God as it ought to be. But I thank God for his gift of sexuality to women as well as men, and his gift of orgasms. God saw that it is good!

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

America Still Desperately Needs God

Or did you already know this? The Sundance festival movie on bestiality made me think again about how far we are from God and leads me to think of other ways we are distant from God as well.

And I think, how long? Americans are good people,showing evidence of our Christian roots, but not good enough. We're still parched and dry, in a desert land far away from God.

Church reflects this more than many other things. The way we worship God, the way we treat God. I was making trips to Canada in desperate attempts to be a part of a church there that was having a phenomenon of the Holy Spirit being poured out. People were getting touched by God in various ways and were coming from all over the world to be there. I had to be there too. The Holy Spirit put a cushion between people that made dealing with people sweeter, I noticed. My own encounters with the Holy Spirit were life changing.

It was costing me every bit of an inheritance and I didn't care. I learned there that one was to treat God as a lover, and to be as a lover in the bedroom with God (don't get grossed out, it's just an analogy) and desire Him. Then the product of that love, a child (i.e., a ministry, service), will come just as naturally as anything and as effortlessly as anything. How few Americans understand this. Americans understand striving, doing, achieving, grabbing, earning. They don't understand being pursued by the lover and the receiving what is not earned.

Revival comes this way, I believe, and is being found by those who have no power in the world. This is a very important point. They have little power or money. Canadians, for example. Their economy is.....sacked.

Anyway, I desire this for America. I have found one church in America that has taken this "fire" back to the States and has carried the vision: River of Life in Raleigh, North Carolina with Dave and Ina Newell. I have visited them and stayed with in the pastor's home and they are as good as they seem! They are the few Americans I know on the same page with me. They have visited this church in Canada a lot too. The name of the Canadian church is Toronto Airport Christian Fellowship.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Naked in Britain




I was just checking out Drudge Report and came across the article about the UK coming out with an Xray technique for looking through clothes as an anti terrorist technique and I thought back to being in England and it kind of made me laugh.

I don't think you want to be looking through my clothes these days, really - not much to see anymore. I don't mean that I don't have weapons, I mean I don't have much to get excited about anymore. "It's embarrassing, really," I can just hear the Brits say.

Although, I wonder just what you can hide inside abdominal fat today, if you wanted to hide a weapon. Might be something to look into. I shouldn't give that one away, if the wrong people are reading this.

Saturday, January 27, 2007

More Americans Take Volunteer Vacations

ABC News Reports

More Americans are choosing to go on philanthropic vacations — along with their extra time and money. Globe Aware, the nonprofit group that organized the McNamaras' Cambodia trip, says enrollment has gone up 40 percent every year since the organization started in 2001.

Last year, more than 65,000 Americans traveled overseas to take part in volunteer vacations, estimates Stefanie Rubin, director of the International Volunteer Programs Association. Organizers say there was a surge of renewed interest after 9/11 and the Asian tsunami in 2004.

"I think it's got people thinking about the world: 'What's out there? What real need is out there?' And how they can connect and be a part of this beautiful world we're in?" says Kimberly Haley-Coleman, the executive director of Globe Aware. "I suspect that there is a growing contingent of people who feel that writing a check to an organization doesn't feel as significant as donating their time. Both are important."

It's not just overseas: After Hurricane Katrina, thousands of volunteers flocked to the Gulf region to help rebuild.

I have felt this same urge, but without the means to carry it out. Important point: "more Americans" means that Americans haven't gone into their little holes since terrorist threats but have been more ready than ever to get up and out and do things for others because we are not cowards and because we care!

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Depressing about Dakota Fanning




This girl has some weird parents. I have been noticing her for some time. She has been in some cute movies like Charlotte's Web where she plays some appropriately cute parts, but she also appears in some disturbing movies where she has to deal with some adult subject matter she shouldn't have to. Then they came out with that line of fashions that she represents where she's being the sexy girl. And now she is in a new movie where she has to play a girl getting raped at 12. I pray for her to turn out OK, as I've wondered what all the exploitation of her career in Hollywood and her unusual upbringing will do to her. Are there any celebrities you feel led to pray for? For some reason Johnny Depp is another one I keep remembering.

Here, years later, all we hear about is Depp. Wow! Now it's 2022!!

Monday, January 22, 2007

Sometimes....you just need a friend to be there for you.



I guess you're not my friend!


an Eden original greeting card

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Question Mark Over...



A 16 year old blogger who was coming on my site said he questioned Walmart way back when I said I liked Walmart, and now I've seen the Frontline special asking if Walmart is good for America and I have to answer, maybe not. See, I wrote a post saying how I liked Walmart and while traveling all over, Walmart has been such a comfort to me. In every smaller town, Walmart has been this beacon of light - definitely a place to turn to for an oil change if nothing else, and a fun place to shop, with some good deals.

But there have been so many questions raised about the place. The boy mentioned the fact that was brought up in the special about relying on young Chinese who work for 50 cents an hour to manufacture products for Walmart, and I've heard about the low wages for their employees. So, a savings goes to us, the consumer, but a huge profit goes to the few on the top.

Recently I've heard about stringent rules about getting late, even in bad weather or getting fired. And the special talked about putting Rubbermaid and an American TV manufacturer out of business. They have forced other businesses to follow them to try to keep up the pace, but in a cut-throat way. They have mowed down small town businesses. They are like a big bulldozer. They are greedy and too powerful. The facts about them are kinda scary.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Diamond Fantasy Bra for 6 Million $



How about this kingdavid and Gino? (who talked about Cirque Du Soleil and 3,000 dollar undies) ABC News Day in Pictures

A model displays the Diamond Fantasy Bra, jointly designed by Hearts On Fire and Victoria's Secret, in Taipei, Taiwan. The designer bra is studded with 800 karat diamonds and sells for $ 6,108,735.
(Chiang Ying-ying/AP Photo)


BTW Mark Twain reportedly invented or helped invent the bra, can you believe that?

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

The Pursuit of Happyness



Along the lines of black over-comers, Will Smith shines again in this great movie. My family and I saw it on New Year's eve. It is a good story about a decent man struggling to use his talents to finally break through a life of near poverty. He got a tip from a stock broker that if he was good with figures and good with people he could make it. This role was appropriately played by Will Smith who is an African American with a great attitude. He is playing a black man who overcame any racial obstacles with a good attitude.

It has great family values - a father fighting to take care of his son. I didn't realize that Will's real life son plays the son in the movie. At one point, credit is given to God for his success, showing his faith in God. It's a must-see.

Of course, it brings up the question, is the American dream pursuing happiness actually individuals pursuing their own selfish ends, thus, we end up with a society of some getting rich and many more getting poorer, and no real utopia achieved? The pursuit of happiness only makes sense if it means that we are free to make choices to pursue what we believe is important in life, and to have the means to do it. This is the story of a man who is able to get beyond a meager existence and use his talents to live a prosperous life. But it suggests that there are values that he considers important with which to live his life, making his pursuit more than material.

Monday, January 15, 2007

Overcoming Racism

Rick Joyner's prophetic ministry located in Charlotte, NC, includes this little booklet on the great hope and future for the black race. Here is an excerpt from the book:

"If the white race, or any other people, had suffered the same historic problems as the black race, we would be having the same problems they are having now. I have heard many white leaders actually say that we would have no inner city problems if blacks just had some ambition. What do you think slavery did to the work ethic? Such deep cultural wounds cannot be healed without the intervention of the cross.

The black race in America was allowed to be subject to slavery for the same reason that the Lord allowed Israel to become slaves in Egypt - they have a destiny with God. When they come into this destiny, the rest of America is going to be very thankful for this great and noble people in our midst. It is the destiny of the black race to carry freedom to a new level. This will be true freedom, with the dignity and honor that God created men to have.

THE POWER FOR HEALING

It was by the Lord's stripes that we were healed. In a sense we too, receive the authority for healing in the very place where we are wounded, once the wounds have been healed. Even when the wounds have been healed, there is sensitivity in that area that remains. Someone who has been subjected to abuse will be sensitive to others who have been abused. When someone who is subjected to abuse is truly healed, they will not only be truly free, but they will have the authority to carry healing to others with those same wounds.

The black race is going to embrace the cross, receive healing for their wounds, and start loving white Americans with such power that we will all be set free by that love.

The Uncle Tom of Uncle Tom's Cabin [you know how negatively black people have thought of this man] truly was a prophetic figure. In spite of all the abuse that he suffered at the hands of his "owners," he was freer than they were, and he was willing to use his freedom to lay down his life if that would result in his owner's salvation. The black believers in America, when they have been fully healed will bring revival and true spiritual liberty to the whole nation.

The inner cities of America will ultimately become the inner sanctuary of God's tabernacle; the place where his glory and presence dwells. The greatest move of God that America has ever experiences will come out of the inner cities. The suburban church may have the gold, but the inner church will make them jealous with the glory. Those who are wise will take the gold that they have and use it to build a tabernacle for the Lord that is not made with hands, but with people."

These are some powerful words by a white man.

God Is In Control? Part 2

It was pointed out in our Alpha course, that Jesus taught us to pray, "Thy Will Be Done" thus God's will isn't always being done, unless we get involved. If God's will already is done then we don't need to pray that prayer.

We think it should be so easy. Everything that comes is God's will sent to teach us something and all we have to do is accept things as from God and learn. So, that prayer means acceptance of God's will then. No. That prayer is asking God for his will to be done. It is a prayer asking God to move, to change things.

To ask for God's will to be done we first need to be sure that it is God's will that we want. We need to be sure that God is truly good.

There are those lovers of God who believe He is good who find themselves under attack. In my parents' church there is a pastor who had been on the mission field in Madagascar and came home because of a disease. I have been to their church numerous times lately and have seen this pastor again. I remembered there was something special about him from the old days when I also went to their church when I lived at home. My mother lent me a book he wrote and in it I read a chapter on deliverance for the Madagascar natives from the evil spirits that come from their ancient religious beliefs. He tells about how the people were delivered in the name of Jesus.

The people of my parents church are not pentecostal, or inclined towards acceptance of supernatural gifts. Nevertheless, faced with the need for confronting the supernatural occult powers of the ancient religion of the Africans, this dear pastor found the essentials that could overcome.

This dear pastor was attacked with a disease and had to leave the mission field.

In this same church I have a dear old friend from our teen years when we were in the youth group, who got cancer and the radiation damaged her heart. She had hands laid on her and the cancer went away, but the remaining damage to her heart is life threatening. She is the one person in the church who is a visionary. She has tried to hold a prayer meeting in her home because she wants to see growth in the church, but the church has been slow to respond. She has a sincere heart for God and her life is under attack.

My mother has a friend whose son is a missionary. She has other sons, but the son who is on the mission field is the one who is faced with a paralyzing illness.

I have a friend from church who prays for people and counsels them. She has a vision for restoring the limbs of war veterans and others who have lost body parts. She herself has diabetes and badly damaged legs and feet. She wears braces on her legs and is wheeled into hospitals where she goes to pray for the sick. She keeps believing for her own healing. She keeps getting attacked. She has had numerous attacks on her own body, and her husband and son both died on her recently. Her son was one of two sons who was most passionate about God and was also a provider for a wife and two daughters. He was just starting to see victory in his life over his problems in health and finances. She keeps believing, but she has an uphill battle. She is aware of her enemy, and does not accept the negative things that have come into her life as coming from God.

It is a staggering reality to recognize just how much of a price one pays to love God, to love the truth and to fight for it. In my own life, I cannot believe when I look back how tangible the enemy that has come against me in my quest for my own victories. But I have had to fight for good to prevail over evil. I have had to fight for God's will over Satan's will. That is why I don't think that God is automatically in control.

My friend from my parents' church (with heart damage) and I have talked about this. We talked about the passage in Hebrews that says the men of old died in faith never having seen things that they hoped for, and would only see in heaven. I said it is kind of like the founders of the United States who died with the vision of America. They didn't get to live it, but they could see it one day. Abraham and other founders could see the glorious things they were contributing to one day, though they could not participate in them. We can see the power and the miracles that God's people should one day experience. My friend from my church who is in braces is doing everything she can to help everyone she can see the power of God in their lives and to experience it herself, and to pay it forward for the future generations.

It is obvious that it is possible to experience more of God's miraculous power by being in a closer position with God. The faith healers whose ministries have produced great miracles prove that. We don't have everything God would have for us without a tremendous fight. We don't have God's will done on earth without a battle that involves our own will and determination fully engaged in it. Sadly, this is a revelation missing in the earth, and my little post on my little blog is an attempt to bring that revelation to someone.

In countries that are war-torn, where Christianity is threatened and Christians are forced into hiding or are threatened with death or torture, the battle is obvious. In the West, in America, the battle is very real but subtle. We are also under constant attack, but the attacks are things like depression, or lethargy and compromise - keeping the power of God locked up and keeping a relationship to God off in one compartment of life. If Satan can have it this way, he is appeased.

In this life we never have a true victory with ease. It will always come with a price. The will of God has to be fought for. This is how it has been for me. I discovered, yes, I do love God and want his best for my life and now, oh, I have to fight an enemy for it.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Blogging With Cappuccino


This is how I blog. At a coffee shop with a cappuccino in hand. Just thought you'd like to know.

Monday, January 08, 2007

God Is In Control?

I was taking an Alpha course at an evangelical free church in Minneapolis, and there was a discussion. Most of the members insisted that God is in control of every aspect of their lives.

Excuse me, but if God is in control, then please explain the world to me. I don't believe God is in control unless we put him in control. And my problem is that I don't think I really have him in control of things. I long to truly see His will be done on earth as it is in heaven. I have seen too much of Satan's will being done, not only in my life but in the life of other, genuine believers.

The thing is that if you truly know God, there is nothing about him that you will not like. And because of that you will want nothing but his will to be done. He desires for you what you desire for yourself.

When I have been the most passionate in desire for God, then I have been under the worst attack and have had the worst things happen to me. I have so many examples of those who have been on the mission field and they have been afflicted with a disease and have had to return home and discontinue their service to God. I have a dear friend from my teen years who I have gotten in touch with again, finding out she is now a mature believer who is very in love with Jesus, just in time to find out she is supposed to die soon.

There was the great evangelist Smith Wigglesworth who saw great miracles: people raised from the dead, limbs restored, among others, and I had the privilege of knowing a Smith Wigglesworth of the late 20th century who died in his late 80s. He had amazing miracles in his ministry as well. Ministers such as these obviously have some special connection to God that enables them to have this power and these miracles, but it should not belong exclusively to a few people, but to all believers.

Yet, sadly, so many believers live under so much oppression and defeat. God is not in control in their lives. Christians labor under the idea that God has sent all these bad things to teach a lesson, so that they won't even begin to part with them based on knowing that a loving God has not placed these things upon them. They have a relationship with the devil, not God. They call God the devil.

When will we ever see an end to the works of the devil? Jesus said he came to destroy those works. We can't see an end to them if we accept them as from God.

Friday, January 05, 2007

Thursday, January 04, 2007

I'm Asking The One Question That Every Single Girl Dreams About...


are you male or female?


an Eden original greeting card

To My One True Love....


I hope you're in prison 'cause you haven't called in a really long time.



an Eden original greeting card

To The One Person I Consider To Be My Soul Mate!





Or didn't You Know?





an Eden original greeting card

Don't Be Sad Because It's Over....




be happy because the very strange man is out of your life!



an Eden original greeting card

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Milk as a Creamer



There are some blessings I do have to be thankful for in life such as this great friend that I've had for maybe 17 years now, named Dominick. We have never even held hands as it has been platonic for all this time. We have a running joke between us. We get together often for breakfast,as we both love breakfast food, and we both love to have coffee with milk as a creamer instead of cream. It's not the caloric content so much, it's just that milk tastes better. So, one of us will always ask the waitress for milk as a creamer and turn to the other and laugh, since we've been doing this for..ever.

Here is a scenario I thought of with Dominic in a cafe, based on an experience we had in one cafe where they wanted to charge for the milk(!):

He orders coffee, and tells waitress
“I want milk as a creamer.”
She says “Oh, yes, we have cream”
“No, I want milk instead of cream,”
“OK – you want a glass of milk?”
“No, I want milk to use as a creamer in coffee instead of cream”
“Ok, let me ask my boss how much for that.”
She comes back and says, "It will cost 30 cents for a small mini pitcher of milk(!)" (it may take 3 of those for all the coffee.)
Dominick says,“but cream is more expensive than milk!”
“Oh, so you want cream then?”
“No, you give the cream for free so the milk shouldn’t cost more!”
“Sir, we don’t serve milk as a creamer, it costs for the adjustment."
"Ok, bring me milk anyway then."
"Alright, milk then."
She brings the coffee, and next to it, a bowl of little containers of cream. When the bill comes, she has charged him an extra 30 cents for milk.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

If a blogger dies, how would you know?

Doesn't it kind of freak you out when you think that if you died, none of your cyber friends would find out?

Your blog would suddenly freeze, abandoned, and none of your friends or family would be able to put a post on it saying, "this blogger is now with the Lord. May she rest in peace" or anything like that, because they don't have your password. And so far, no one I know knows anyone that I know on the internet. Kinda crazy.

I have noticed several bloggers who disappeared back in April, or August, or...

and so it just occurs to me.

If I should die before I post another one, at least this blog has, in part, recorded a lot of what I have wanted to say, or to present of what has made up my life. And it will live on beyond me, and that is very cool.

And if I disappear, God forbid, I just want to say, "see you in the great beyond."

Saturday, December 30, 2006

Good Riddance to...



a dictator not unlike Hitler
a "butcher" but not at your local grocer
a killer of 1/2 million? 2 million(?)
a violent rapist
a torturer of innocents
a hater of Jews
a hater of any race or religion or sect not his own
a hater of human free will
a direct agent of Satan who called our president "The Great Satan"
a maggot
a disgusting,
revolting,
poor excuse for a human being!
"Now he is in the garbage of history"
I slept better last night after he was gone.

Two famous men just died. One receives scorn and the other, great honor(Ford)

Friday, December 29, 2006

Names For Cats

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Black/white cats:
Felix
Sylvester
Piano
Panda
Cow
Tuxedo
Oreo
Kummerbun
Skunk
Boo


Male cats:
Kong
Beastie Boy
Silly Billy or Silly
Scoundrel
Rascal
Punkie
Prince
Bubbie
Bubba or Gump
Persnickety
Snickers
Furball
Munchkin
Ranger
Bear
Teddy
Pooh
Punkin’
Dude
Whiskers
Bumper
Thumper
Bugs
Rabbit
Boo
Guerilla
Buster
Buddy

Female cats:
Petunia
Truffle
Ruffle
Sugar
Belle
Girlie girl
Bubbly
Polka Dot
Angel
Twinkle
Tinker Bell
Pansy
Daisy
Princess
Rosebud
Sweetum
Sweetie
Lovie
Darlin’
Punkin’
Duster
Stardust
Beauty
Bunny
Cutie
Beepie
Taffy
Persnickety

Calicos:
Pepper

Fat Cats:
Humpty Dumpty
Tubby
Centipede
Plumpy

Samba's Fruit Jews!



Once you could only get Fruit Chews by Samba, but now there's Fruit Jews!

there’s a Hasidic Jew shaped chew with the hat and the long curls
there’s Marsha Schwartz, with an attitude
there’s a Jewish American Princess
there’s a rich jeweler from the Bronx
there’s the Israeli soldier

Loved by Arabs and most Muslims!
It’s Chewy, it’s Jewy!
Chew on a Jew!


an Eden original fake ad

Sixties Slang


Can you dig it? (from 50's beatnik)
crazy man! (beatnik)
you cats, you chicks (beatnik)
oughta sight!
far out, man!
groovy, groovin'
hip
cool
love-in
sit-in
peace!
love!
baby!
right on
for real, man
tell it to me straight
sock it to me
bummer
bum me out
what a drag
where it's at
get it together
get it on
I'm trippin'
what a trip
don't get fresh (flirt)
tell it like it is
back up and regroup
blows me away
what's happening
it's a happening thing
getting high
this is not my scene
psychedelic
jam up and jelly tight
down with racism
up with civil rights
doin my OWN thing
are you with it?
i have to be myself
got to be me
neat
get my drift?
big deal
my bag
a put-down
blow him off
are you with it?
That's where I'm coming from



Also: Valley girl, 80's slang

barf me out, gag me with a spoon
i'm sure
oh, like, totally awesome
what's the bottom line?
it's bitchin'
not my crowd
chill out
what a nerd
it's like...

I'm Not Talking to Myself...


I'm praying!


Eden original bumper sticker idea

Top Ten Worst Reasons Why You Can't Go Out With Someone



1. "My car suddenly wouldn't start this morning, and if your car is working well enough to come and see me, well, then I am also ill today. Sorry."

2. "I was captured by aliens, and I have to go re-set all my clocks."

3. "I have to wash my hair, sorry."

4. "I have an ingrown toenail."

5. "I just found out I'm gay, and I need to be alone for awhile."

6. "It's Sunday. I'm keeping the Sabbath, and that means no dating."

7. "Elvis dropped in for a snack, and I'm all out of peanut butter and ice cream."

8. "My mother is having a kniption, and I have to help her get the schpeelchus out of her gnectegezoink."

9. "I WON THE LOTTERY! When I went to claim the dough, I exchanged the check for a bag of large bills and someone robbed me. As a result, I am completely depressed and more broke than ever after paying a lawyer and a private detective to solve the case. Consequently, I am also very ill today."

10. "Someone predicted that it's the end of the world, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna spend my last night with you."

Co-writer: My dear friend Dominic (an unknown with the comic equivalent of just about any top-notch pro)

Song For Eagles


For the generation that would be my children...



We were the generation of blown minds
the one that the hinge turned on
the one the world turned on...the one the world "turned onto".. things.
they blew our minds
they passed the grass
"acid" test
the "me" generation

did they care enough about the "you" generation?
we were guinea pigs
they told us to smoke this, don't worry about it
later we were in mental hospitals

but you came along
your generation rose out of the pit that was ours
there you were - strong
and you can do and be so many things we cannot be - go where we cannot
carry the torch

fly eagle
fly to the seas
fly to the mountains
fly to the streams
where we can never be
to the things we could never reach, the things we could never be

fly eagle
soar
be what you can be
reach what you can reach

I won't hold you back with the bitterness of my tears of my lost years
I won't give him that one last victory, to hold you back by groveling in my self pity
To try to keep you from trying
To keep you from flying

Proverb: (by whom?)
"And with what do we pay when we purchase the truth? Why, young man,
we buy it with our time, and with our youth."

Thursday, December 28, 2006

The Inn Alternative



"There was no room for them in the inn."
I thought of a ministry that could be created for the winter holidays. Please use this idea.

The name of it would be "The Inn Alternative" because it is a refuge on the holidays, like Mary and Joseph's refuge. It would exist for those who have no where to go, and this would run the gamut from those with no family to those who are visiting from out of state or out of country. There would be a dinner on both Thanksgiving and Christmas.

This would not just be in a church, as is often the case but would be advertised city-wide, and would take place in a restaurant open on the holidays. This would be like a support group.

After advertising the ministry, the people who want to attend would have a meeting place where they can decide if they want to spend the holidays with these people, discuss where to have the dinners, and how each one will pay for them. If someone doesn't have money it would be provided for them, perhaps through donations. Some kind of down payment should be made so the leaders know who is going to be there.

Is this a good idea, or is it already "covered" by churches that have free dinners? I got this idea from having a lot of depression and stress during past winter holidays, when I needed to be ministered to and have a substitute for family. The important thing is having the dinners take place
on the actual day. New Year's eve and day could be added to the holidays that are celebrated.

The leaders should be prepared for crisis intervention, such as suicide counseling.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Politically Correct Christmas Greeting

Kingdavid will just have to forgive me but when i find something funny, I have to put it here. After all, not everyone who comes here is going to The Far Wright as well, just as everyone who goes to his site isn't visiting here.

For My Republican Friends:
Here's wishing all of You a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

For My Democratic Friends:
"Please accept with no obligation, explicit or implied, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. And without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher."

Author unknown-

Friday, December 22, 2006

Church Bloopers



I stole this from kingdavid and if he wants to fine me, what can I do? It's just that this is one of the funniest things I've seen in a long time. Church can be a very hilarious place, after all.

These sentences actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:

* The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals
* The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.'
* Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.
* Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
* The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.
* Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community.
* Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't care much about you.
* Don't let worry kill you off. Let the Church help.
* Miss Charlene Mason sang, 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation
* For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
* Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
* The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: 'Break Forth into Joy.'
* Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days!
* A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
* At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.
* Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
* Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
* Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
* The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
* Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM. Prayer and medication to follow.
* The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
* This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn-sing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
* Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All Ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.
* The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
* Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
* The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
* Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
* The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: 'I Upped My Pledge, Up Yours.'

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Sexual Schizophrenia


Oh my g_d! I just cannot believe what is happening to kids in our society and the confused messages they are getting.

How, in a sex permeated society, do we explain to children that they are sexually harassing other kids by touching them in certain ways that they don't even perceive as sexual, while crowning an underage, sexually promiscuous and perverted woman as our own representative? (Miss USA)

I just read an article in Townhall by Dennis Prager about a kindergartener being slapped for sexual harassment. He pinched a girl's butt! He will have it on his record until middle school?! What kind of schizophrenic madness is that? We then teach our children about sex by starting out telling them that they are being sexual when they didn't even know it?

This is too too scary. And there was another article in Townhall by a woman talking about how feminism was supposed to teach women how to be empowered by their liberated sexuality. She mentions pagan women who would put the moves on young men instead of the other way around. Don't they see that this further empowers men?

I look around and say, "it's more of a man's world than ever!" Men are thrilled that women are being liberated to fully explore their sexuality. That means more free sex with no strings attached for them, the dream of every man in his wild, unbridled state. Women have been a civilizing force. The women of my mom's generation (WWII) were in control because they demanded that their men marry them, and that they "buy the cow."

So, we lose that civilizing force, and we lose civilization!

I can just see men of today with a wry smile, an unseen smile curling their lips as they muse, "more sex for me!" But while there is more sexual freedom, there is more paranoia about sexual harassment. It's schizophrenic.

Add to this an article in ABC news about a 17 year old getting 10 years in prison for oral sex with a 15 year old because she cried "rape."

So, girls think they are getting some new freedom and that they are in control, like pagan women, when they are playing right into the hands of men who want control.

I am terrified for our girls and our young men. What is going to happen after this? I am totally ashamed at us for taking such a morally confused woman as our "Miss USA"

Also, I know from studying pagan society and religion, a little, that while a few women had power and solicited sex from men, most of the women were subjugated by these women to a low state, a slavish state, and men still had a lot of power.

I used hammerswing75's photo and I hope he doesn't mind. By the way, everything on my blog is fair game for anyone. You can use my jokes - whatever.

I even put business ideas on here from time to time, and expect someone will take one and use it. Before blogging I had these big ideas about selling my essays, some of which are on here, or my business ideas, and then got wind of how much is offered for free on the internet and I thought, "what the hey(?), join the party!"